Tuesday, May 29, 2012

The Twin Debate

I think I have mentioned before that one of the biggest fears I have about IVF is ending up with twins. I also have mentioned that I have a supportive husband. We when you put the two in the same conversation things have been rocky. My DH loves me and he has made that abundantly clear during this process. Especially since babies scare him. Never mind the fact that he has raised 3 children with me (and did a great job when they were infants) they still scare him. In his family I think there has only been 4 people born after him. One is 1 year younger, one is 8 years younger and two are just over two. He is more terrified of having twins than I am. There is a set on his side of the family (they were naturally conceived and are the two just over two born to the person who is a year younger than him) and my sister (who underwent IVF) has a set. 

We have spent a great deal of time with my sister since her babies have been born, they are almost 2 now. DH has been uneasy around them but he picks them up and plays with them, but never any diaper changes or helps with feedings. While having a conversation with my sister this past weekend (most of my family don't know about us and the IVF plans so she and I usually only talk about it on the phone or messenger) I told her about my dream from last week about having twins and how it partially scared the snot out of me and my DH decides to chime in from the other room, "I'm mentally preparing myself for twins, so I'm good". I wasn't prepared for that. 

When did he become ok? He even had me go through the hospital release forms with a fine tooth comb (twice) to make sure we could request 1 embryo to be transferred. I've been so worried that he would be upset if I didn't demand 1 embryo, I never thought he would 'come around'.  

I know that transferring two gives us better odds of having one 'stick'. So the big question of the day:  Is there any reason why I should only demand one to be transferred over two? 

1 comment:

  1. This is such a hard question... and I've grappled with it myself. With all my cycles up until now, I've had 2 transferred to increase my overall chances of having a single (or twin) pregnancy... but have gone with only one transfer with PGD (b/c the chances are higher of actually getting pregnant with twins and I had a stillbirth 2 years ago due to a clotting issue). From all my research and speaking with my OB etc, the survival rate for twins is a lot higher now a days with twins and better antenatal care... but I couldn't deal with another loss. So hard to know what to do... and others that have twins say it's hard at first then so much fun. Thinking of you while you make a decision xoxo